second wind

lately I've been questioning the accuracy of my traffic reports. they seemed high and I figured it was counting my own visits, despite the fact that I set my preferences to filter out my ISP address.

however, it would seem site meter is, indeed, accurate.

my search engine registration has paid off. a few recovering addicts have found the site and touched base with me-either through the site or via email. these comments have been great, giving me a second wind. dealing with my latest low is much easier now. thank you.

one person specifically noted they were 8 days into the wacky fun of full-blown sobriety. to this person I send my full support and encouragement. remember that by taking it one day at a time...EVERY day you are sober is a victory.

in my offline journal, I have written about how some friends feared that booze is/was my muse. by this I mean, staying sober means I will somehow be less: less fun, less humorous, less creative-less of a person. I call this the Fun Bobby Theory™. "Fun Bobby" was a character on an episode of the TV show, Friends. Everyone liked him. They realized he was drinking too much and encouraged him to stop. Once he was sober, the friends realized he was boring, no fun at all. Hijinks ensue as they wind up blowing off Fun Bobby. Those crazy kids.

Don't worry, I am not going to protest Friends. But I do think it jumped the shark awhile ago.

So, how does one react to the Fun Bobby Theory? Well, initially I was shocked, angry and offended at how many people considered beer to be my secret ingredient...some kind of glue holding me together. but then I realized I was so inextricably linked to beer that no one could picture me without it. that's how bad I had gotten towards the end of my life as an active alcoholic.

so I took the high road and realized that my sobriety involves a lot more work than I thought. I thought my work would be limited to work on ME: dealing with my emotions, my cravings, how my habits impacted my friends and my family. But it also involves work with others: helping other people learn what is involved in sobriety, what sobriety means to a recovering alcoholic, repairing relationships you damaged while you were drinking and much, MUCH more. It forces you to focus on more than just you and your emotions and that is healthy-- good medicine for memyselfandi.

it does not take people very long to realize I am not Fun Bobby. I still have my sense of humor and all the other fun things connected to it. in fact, they quickly realize being sober has made me even better.